Bipolar is like a two-sided mask. On one side it is a happy mask. On the other it is misery.
Minus the polarities, the judgment of a person with bipolar is often effected. That is because a person with this illness have a different kind of reality. It is very much dependent on the dopamine surge. Too much dopamine the person will be in mania and too little he will be in dark depression.
This year I didn't encounter any dark depression. That will be the triumph for this year which to a certain extend offset the depression I had being rejected by Els.
Sigh... Of all the illness, I am stuck with a mental illness.
Well it certainly a handicap. However what puzzled me is within these fluctuation of mood swings and altered perceptions, my thoughts on Al Araf 7:7 is consistent except for one minor incident; when I was in no mood to talk, they didn't talk either.
"That right Sha, we don't talk because it is pointless to talk. You are not in the mood!" Said Brenda X.
Is Al Araf 7:7 the source of my madness? Or is it because of my understanding of the afterlife that did not align to the mainstream? What happen if I reject these epiphanies? I left with nothing to believe. Where else, my belief is my coping mechanism. Al Araf 7:7 keeps me company and the belief in afterlife is what shapes my daily living.
Therefore I'm not going to change anything. I will still believe in Al Araf 7:7 and the afterlife.
If by doing so makes me crazy, so be it. There are many more useless beliefs out there. My beliefs work for me, just like these other beliefs work for others.
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