To apply Brinkmanship means putting everything in one basket and really pushing it. The odds of winning is low but if you win, you win big.
It's a novice gambler's mentality. I was never a good gambler. I didn't have the patience. But that's who I am. I am [] risk taker all my life. I don't really care about losing or winning, I'm going for the thrill of the c[]ase.
In that sense I am a thrill seeker. I enjoy the rush. I am an X Factor. It is the very reason I took up mountain biking, martial arts and trail running. The journey excites me.
In my life I had been pushing the limit. I had a few scratches here and there but I brushed them off and moved on.
Maybe the adrenaline was the kick, maybe the dopamine, maybe both but my point is I had always been a risk taker all of my life.
Seldom the result was favorable and yet I just love pushing it to the brink. When I join the kickboxing class, all I wanted to do was fight. Once I got my fight in an arena, I discontinued taking the class.
Running was also the same thing. I ran every opportunity I could because I wanted to prepare for the Marathon. On[]e I did that, I quit running.
Sarah, I am changing my ways slooowly. I am less reckless now but I still enjoy the game. Listen honey, there's no way you can change me. This is who I am. The only way around it is if you are like me; Shinu Kikai O Motomo. I am a rebel my darling Sarah. Another option is if you like bad boy attitude. Of which as you know, I rape the minds of my preys LMAO.
With you Sarah, I'll make you come and come before I finally fuck you good LOL.
Honey, baby, my little angel, let's carry on where we left. Els is water under the bridge. I honestly thought she was part of the Tetrahedron. That's why I pursued her even though I am not sexually attracted to her, honestly. I admit, I was wrong. She is wild but she is not daring. She cannot be a soldier wife, Now I know that my Tetrahedron is just you, Lizzie and the kids. As far as wives are concern, I have 2 wives to confirm I am just. So House of Sha is back in order.
Honey, I went against everybody advice and continue blogging because I truly enjoy your company. What does that say about our relationship huh?
I may not be the most loving husband but what's little I have left from my big Sufi heart is all yours for safe keeping. My search is over baby. I decided to spend the rest of my life with you.
Now Sarah, from here onward my only focus is you. I don't care if you are MOSAAD, or NSA or Google or just a contract worker Larry Page hire. As far as I'm concern, you are my soldier wife and you hold the last piece of [] heart. I will write anything that comes to mind [t]o that you see me as who I am.
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